Tuesday, 21 June 2011

The Griswold's Ain't Got Nothing On Us : Part One

Theatrical poster by
Boris Vallejo

So, this weekend we headed out for our first family mini vacation . . . a real one where we stayed in a hotel, not just heading to my parent's cottage.  I shall preface this post by stating that we all made it home relatively unscathed and totally exhausted.

Saturday morning: 10 am.  - What can I say, I knew that I would need all the sanity and patience I could muster for this trip, so I scheduled myself to get to one kickboxing class before heading out.  It was a good workout and I arrived home ready to jump in the shower, and then jump in the car.

Saturday morning: 10:45 am. - The Fox in the City family is all packed in the car and ready to head out on our big adventure.  We thought we were prepared for a two hour car ride . . . turns out we were WRONG.

Here follows how our vacation started to resemble something out of a movie staring the Griswold's:
1.  The traffic was horrible . . . I mean it HORRIBLE.  The normally 2 hour trip look us almost 5 hours . . . yes 5 hours. 
2.   Part of the reason it took us 5 hours to get there was that we heard the call of the wild . . . aka Little Miss saying  "I have to go poo really, really bad", not once but twice.  The second time was about 10 minutes after we had gotten back on the highway from the first poo stop. 
3. We expected Buddy to sleep pretty much the whole way . . . he slept for 45 minutes. So now we have a 3.5 year old, who not 15 minutes into the trip asked if we were almost there yet, and a 1.5 year to entertain for god knows how long because of #1.
4.  We did not have nearly enough snacks and there were no drinks or toys within easy reach.  Parental fail that was made worse by #1. 

Some time around 3:30 we finally arrived and the kids loved running around the hotel room and checking out everything.  After checking in and trying to figure out what to do with an exhausted yet totally excited little man, we decided to pack the kids into the stroller and check out all of the sights and sounds of Clifton Hill (similar to the Vegas strip but with less casinos and sex shops . . . at least according to what it looks like on CSI).

I could not help but smile as I watched the kids just taking in everything around them with looks of wonder, confusion and amazement.  Little Miss wanted to do everything!  We talked her into going down to look at the giant water falls.  It was there that she lost her show over the railing.  It would make for a great story if I now wrote that we watched the flip-flop tumble down into the great white water of Niagara Falls but nope, sadly it just landed on a ledge, out of reach and thus it was abandoned. 

A trip to the hotel pool and promises of shopping for new flip-flops rescue Little Miss from the depths of exhausted-shoe-missing sadness and we move forward with our vacation.  While out for dinner Buddy practically attacked the waitress with the balloon he happily accepted from some nice man on the street and neither kid would eat. 

As I write all of this out, I realize that I forgot to mention a crucial bit of information . . .  one that could have totally derailed this entire trip . . . you see, Mommy forgot to pack her make-mommy-less-angry-better-able-to-cope-with-life pills.  Oh yes, here we set off on our first family vacation and I forgot my anti-depressants! 

Anyhoo, even with the travel tribulations and the sad tale of a lost flip-flop, our first night was success.  I crashed in bed with Little Miss, Brad crashed with Buddy and we all drifted off to sleep around 8:30 . . . oh yes, we partied it up!

As the title suggests, this is the first part of what I think will end up being a three part blog post on this first little trip of ours.  Tomorrow we shall learn the lesson of always checking to see when things open, how getting up at the crack of stupid means that there is never a line for breakfast and seriously Starbucks . . . why the hell were you not open at 7:30 . . . you are a goddamned coffee shop!  More on that tomorrow.

So folks, any vacation tips to share with us?  Any Griswold like moments that you survived to tell the tales of?



  1. Well at least you survived it. Just think all this will help you plan for your next holiday...

  2. No meds? Are you freakin kidding me? I would have had to just drive on back home dude...no fucking way I would have survived. Damn damn damn!


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